…and then i said…

Man: Can I ask you something and you promise not to get mad?

Me: Sure!

Man: I’ve been staring at you from across the room for a while and I was just wondering….

Me: *gulp!! Shifts nervously…..

Man: I noticed you’re wearing a loose fitting shirt… are you hiding something?

Me: *confused and wondering where this is leading…

Man: You know, as in.. are you hiding a little belly under that? Are you pregnant?

Me: relieved because she wasn’t sure where exactly this conversation was leading and that question is better than all the alternatives that were running through my mind!

*laugh hysterically and say, “Ah yes.. I AM actually hiding something. Well you see, too many pepsi’s and Snickers later.. I wear the shirt to hide the big belly. So YES the shirt is for a reason. But NO it’s not the reason you thought.

Man: laughs…. Then says, “Well good for you!” (whatever that means!)

Me: I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. I mean first of all, who asks that? And secondly why is NOT being pregnant “good for me?”

Well, wait… don’t answer that. I know why it’s good for me to NOT be pregnant. The whole miserable 9 months, the labor pain, etc.

Anyways, the innapropriateness of his question cracked me the hell up. Stuff like that is GREAT! Classic. Shocking! Incredibly hilarious. And I can’t really blame him. But I mean, really? WHO ASKS THAT?


5 responses to “…and then i said…

  1. I would have said, “Yes, but if I told you what it was you’d try to stop me and then I’d have to kill you.”

  2. Really?! That takes some balls. Wow. He’s lucky you’re awesome and didn’t tear him a new one.

  3. WHO ASKS THAT?!?! For real. lol You took it a lot better than I would have. 😉

  4. Good Lord. I mean, really.

  5. SciFi.. ha. I should have but I was just in shock and a little embarrassed so I wasn’t thinking clearly.

    f.B., k8 and sleepyjane I think it’s because I know he is an older gentleman (late 70’s) and so he comes from a different generation and doesn’t know it’s legal in most states to beat the ass of somebody who dares asks a fat chick if she’s pregnant.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s